Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Exactly Three Years Ago

I have no idea what prompted us. I can not remember what I was doing or where I was. Our son Tommy was a little over a year old. I babysat my niece Corrine during the week.

Yes, Tommy is holding a bra...don't ask...

Tommy only woke up a couple of times during the night. I had planted my first "real" garden that summer. My life was starting to become less crazy (anyone who knows us, knows my little Tommy was not the easiest baby... he would rank in top five of worst babies ever!!!) I do not remember doing internet searches. I do not remember really anything about the exact beginning. I do know that we filled out a contract with European Adoption Agency in July of 2008. That is where it began.

Before Kenney and I were married, I had mentioned something about adopting one day, just because it seemed like a good thing to do. Kenney said okay, and the conversation was over.

We just assumed that when we were "all done" having biological kids, we would then adopt.  I remember one day asking Kenney what he thought about adopting now.
Little did I know that God was speaking to our hearts and we didn't even realize it. We didn't know that God already had a little boy planned for our family. We didn't know he already existed. We didn't realize that God had a plan, a plan a bit different than ours.
Kenney likes plans. Kenney is a planner. He keeps plans. He makes plans. One thing he doesn't like to do is CHANGE plans. I remember him asking me why I wanted to change our plan. I remember telling him, that it isn't good to be so set on our own plans, and maybe God had a different plan. I know a couple weeks went by, and during that time I lovingly, okay maybe that is not true, I guess I just pushed the "adopt now" idea. (I recomend the lovingly way though, it works better!) One day Kenney just agreed.

Kenney researched adoption agencies and we talked about what kind of adoption, and where we would adopt from. Adopting a baby seemed logical because we were used to having two babies around. Russia just seemed to be the place God put on our hearts. The ratio of boys to girls in Russia was 7 to 1, so a boy seemed logical. The idea of children in orphanages bothered us, and we felt that is where God was sending us.

We just jumped in. I know we did not really talk about adopting with anyone else. We did our homestudy, initial paperwork, completed a dossier, all while keeping it between us. It was special for us. God used that time to bring us closer. We talked about all kinds of things together, that maybe if the world knew, we would not have talked about. We just might have been consumed with everyone else and their questions and thoughts, that we just might not have had the opportunity to talk between us. We talked about poverty, Russia, birth control, abortion, orphanages, foster care, orphans all over the world and much, much more. We had real conversations about big important issues, and it was between us. It was special. I do not recommend NOT talking about things to others, but for us, it was special, it was something that was just ours and no one elses. It was God's plan for US.

There was no scripture verse or sermon at church that promoted us to adopt. We got pregnant with Tommy before actually "trying". We had no fertility concerns. I had not had a miscarriage (which I did have one in September of that year, however our decision to adopt had been made long before the miscarriage occurred.) Our God can choose to motivate us however He wants. We were and are no one extraordinary. We weren't "super christians." We didn't lead a bible study, or volunteer every week at the food pantry. We had arguments and fights between us. We didn't parent Tommy perfectly. My point is this, sometimes, you just hear God speaking to you. Sometimes it is in no special place, at no special time. It's just when God wants to speak to you.  Our plan was not to adopt till years later, we would have never come up with adopting at that moment in time on our own.

Kenney and I agreed on one thing though.  That when God speaks.... you listen. 

Proverbs 3:5-7 
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths. Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord, and turn away from evil.

1Samuel 12:14-15
If you will fear the Lord and serve him and obey his voice and not rebel against the commandment of the Lord, and if both you and the king who reigns over you will follow the Lord your God, it will be well. But if you will not obey the voice of the Lord, but rebel against the commandment of the Lord, then the hand of the Lord will be against you and your king.

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